So I know a few post of past I had mentioned the glorious and, in my opinion, GENIUS, book called Go The Fuck To Sleep. Well, I have been thinking quite a bit about this book throughout my days of daily motherhood torture, and I have come up with a few more books that I would love to see on the bookshelves.
Yes my love, I do see that super fun toy over there. It does look like a great toy in which to play. But now is not the time to carouse my dear, no time in which to squeal. So please, if you may, drop that toy, come to the table and Eat your f$%#ing meal!
Look at the sun so bright in the sky, the grass so green down below. The rocks are shining alight on the ground with a strange and sparkly glow. So many thing to see on the way, so very much to explore. I can see that you are a bit distracted my little one, by all that nature brings near and far, but mama is late for her appointment now, so please, for the love of god, Get in The F*&# in the Car.
I can see you wriggle to the left handsome man, I can see you wriggling to the right. You can hop up and down on one foot my dear, than switch that hopping to the other. You are having too much fun, I can see that cutie pie, you just don't want to leave. Your friends are all here, you are having a splendid time, so let's not make this into certain wars. Please my child, I beg of you please Don't Pee in your F%&$ing Drawers!
And so very very many more could be out there. A whole library of parenthood frustration venting........It would be glorious. We could all be rich, RICH I say! Man, why didn't I think of writing that book? Bah.