Monday, December 20, 2010

Privawhat?

Now what is that word again? Pro.....Pra.....Pri..vic....va...ci...cy?? Oh yes, Privacy, that's it! This is something that has not been in my vocabulary in so long that I forget how to pronounce the bloody thing! Only on the earlest of mornings, when both children are sleeping, and I sneak out of bed without a sound, am I able to go to the bathroom by myself.

For the last (nearly) three years I have had to take my darling, loving, affectionate son with me to go to the bathroom. On the (very) odd ocassion I could leave him in one spot and run to take a super quick pee, number 2 however? Nope, he would not tolerate that much time alone not being held by his number one mum. At first I had to haul him over my shoulder in order to somehow manhandle my pants etc with one hand over my legs, hip and arse.

Then he got older. He start to be able to move. I couldn't leave him out there on his own, he might get into mischief or hurt himself. So in he went with me, sitting contentfully on his mama's lap while she sat not contentfully on the can.

And then he could really move and he would see me trying to sneak away to the bathroom and he would hystericcally run after me as if I was intending to leave him for good. And up he would go back onto my lap contentfully.

And then he got a bit older. I would always leave the door open so he knew where I was. And in he would come. Not crying or upset, just curious. And with his newly acquired words he would discuss with me what mama was doing on the toilet. 'Mama poop' he would say with joy lighting up his eyes, 'stinky', good lord.

And then he got even older and so was born his little brother. I had to bring him in the bathroom with me so as not to leave him with his little, fragile, unsuspecting brother who very well may have sufficated from all the love and affection that would have been rained on him.

And now I have the new little one, who is not content to sit and giggle in his bouncy chair in the livingroom while I sneak away for some private bathroom time. Nope, he would prefer to join me on my journey of excretion. And so the cycle continues and mama is still searching for that lost word in her vocabulary...................

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