Thursday, November 25, 2010

Oh yeah, babies!

There are some things that I totally forgot about babies and having them in our house (and having them in the first place quite honestly) and some things that have downright surprised me.

Cleaning mustard with milk curdled poop from diapers and bum a MILLION times a day-oh yeah!

Having to do above cleaning from little tiny dark baby bum hairs-surprise!

Waking up way way too many times a night and potentially staying up for hours at a time-oh yeah!

Doing above activities with toddler sneaking into your bed and laying awake while playing (very annoyingly at this point) with your hair-surprise!

Birth itself? I knew there was a good chance of a some tearage, but not THAT much! Now I have a frankingina! Sorry Va-jay-jay!

The unbelievably enchanting smell of babies. I stick my nose in his hair, in his neck, in his mouth (yup I am gross) and inhale deeply. mmmmmm It is like nothing else. yummy. Oh yeah. However, you must be careful with the neck, there are some serious cheesey parts! (secretly still yummy!!)

The impossible amount that these little people sleep................Jealous much? Up to 20 hours a day for the first couple of weeks. (side note, same as lions, just saying).

The sometimes impossibility of putting these miniature men to sleep. This is where the mama arms come in. There is a serious amount of lifting and rocking and carrying and shushing the transferring from one possible sleep aiding vessel to another. A very very physical job this mothering is.

The sounds of babies. Their gurgling, cooing, giggling, boobs leak just thinking about it (a sign of affection in motherhood!). And the cries, my god, those new born infant shrieks that could induce anxiety in any mother or non mother alike. You will do anything in your power to make that red alert siren stop, again the boobs are leaking just thinking about it!

Okay, lets be honest here, my boobs are ALWAYS leaking. Remember that? I forgot. There was a time when I could wear a shirt two days in a row. Those days are past. I try on yesterdays shirt and have to hold back the gag reflex and bile coming up my throat from the quick and painful whiff of sour milk that encompasses my olfactory system. My emotions are displayed for all to see in large dark circles forming around my breasts. And this leakage is no slow drip, this is a spray that has hit my tiny elf leader in the eye at ten paces. These babies are lethal!

Well that is pretty much all my brain can muster for now, but i am sure I am in for a many 'oh yeah' and 'surprises' in the very near future!

No comments:

Post a Comment